How Unbecoming
by Seashells1000
Summary: A Tragedy Fic based on another one I've read before. It's pretty sad. :3 NaruHina She's dead. Gone. But she's still there. Everywhere he turns she's there. But the scariest part would be that he's getting used to it.


_I read this really sad fanfiction called 'Remembrance' earlier on... It inspired me to write a fanfiction, too._

_I don't own this, and I don't make money off of this fanfiction._

* * *

Blood Orange - Forget It

Tsunade eyed Naruto, trying to phrase what she was going to say.

"Naruto, as you may know, Hinata went on a mission-" Her voice cracked. Tsunade silently cursed the bottle that was in front of her. Sake made her emotional.

"What about it, granny?" Naruto asked, smiling at her. _He didn't hear it. Good, _Tsunade thought, gripping the neck of the bottle of wine in front of her.

The Hokage's office was thick with the tension of heavy news. Sakura and Neji sat adjacent to Naruto, eyeing him carefully. _Restrain him if he gets violent. Console him if he starts to cry..._

"Hinata will not be returning from this mission," Tsunade chose her words carefully.

"She's gone rogue? That's not like Hinata. Is this a joke?" Naruto asked, a sly smile already gracing his face.

"She died, Naruto. She died on this mission." Sakura saved Tsunade the hassle. She placed a hand on Naruto's shoulder, but he didn't even acknowledge it.

"Shino and Kiba brought her back. She was still in the infirmary." She continued while rubbing his shoulder soothingly. Eventually, the whole room fell silent, waiting for Naruto to speak.

"She died..." He solemnly repeated once more. _Console him if he starts to cry..._

"It was a fitting death for a shinobi." Naruto finally said. He took it better than Neji, who didn't cry but refused to look at or talk to anyone.

"I have to leave. Kakashi asked me to sort papers." The obvious lie fooled nobody, yet they let him walk out the doorway.

"Be stoic, calm, and confident in the face of death. Like a true shinobi." Tsunade distractedly recited what she was told during Dan's death. "Is being a shinobi really worth that?" The question hung unanswered.

* * *

_"Naruto, I'm going on an S-rank mission today..." Hinata said timidly._

_"You are? When?" Naruto asked, absentmindedly running his hands through her hair._

_"Any day now... I'm worried. It's our first S-rank mission since Madara was defeated. I wonder why Tsunade chose me?" Hinata reasoned. "She chose you because you're an amazing ninja. Don't worry about little things." He comforted her._

_"I know." She smiled, and Naruto had to smile back. She was perfect, with her lavender eyes and her small nose and lips. She always had an aura that made grinning inevitable and infectious._

_Naruto's smile, in turn, made her grin, and soon they were just laughing._

Her laugh...what had been so incredibly pleasing before was...was

"Haunting." He said the thought aloud. _Why would Tsunade send her out alone on an S-Rank mission? Why? Why? Why?_

Naruto was pounding on the wall, creating fractures in the years-old stone.

"How dare they?" He wanted to scream, but it only came out an angry whisper. "Who gives them the right?"

_BAM! BAM! _Naruto's fists connected with the wall once more. Soon he was just punching the things in his range, with tears blinding his vision. He eventually punched a vase, resulting in bloody and bruised knuckles that would hurt immensely, if he could feel the pain. He sunk to the floor and sobbed, barely able to breathe. _She was his life, and now she would be his death._

* * *

He was at home, watching the kettle boil. A pack of Instant Noodles ramen sat at his side, accumulating dust.

_"Naruto, you shouldn't eat so much ramen, you need protein and vegetables." Hinata scolded him, catching him boiling water for another instant pack. _

_"Miso pork and vegetables! duh!" He beamed at her, and she laughed at him._

Suddenly, the idea of eating another bowl of ramen made him feel sick. He turned the stove off and angrily threw the pack of instant noodles at the wall. He got a glimpse of the flavor before he stormed off: Miso pork and ramen.

* * *

Still in bed. The 3rd day in a row. The sheets were ruffled and messy, but he was far past the point of caring. He slept constantly, after he had a dream and he could swear he _felt her. _Her curves on his, together once more.

He woke up the fifth time that morning to see Hinata, smiling next to him. His eyes widened, and fresh tears spilled over because when he got close enough to touch she was gone.

_She's dead. People die every day. I'm just remembering her. _Naruto convinced himself this. But it started to happen more frequently. He'd see her face, her body, her _smile..._ he'd get up to reach for her, and she would dissappear.

* * *

Konoha was gossiping again. '_He broke down' 'right at the funeral' 'how unbecoming'._

He was far past the point of caring. He almost missed it; arriving half an hour late, he walked directly towards her casket.

_She's just laying there... like yesterday in my bed..._

Instinctively, he reached a hand out to touch. Fingers met with cold skin, and he fell to the ground crying because she didn't disseappear this time. Was that better, though?

Someone escorted him out. He didn't bother to look until she spoke to him.

"Do you have the keys, Naruto-kun?" She asked, trying the front door. Naruto's head shot up, and he looked into the stranger's eyes. It was Hinata, and it was the first time she had talked to him outside of his dreams.

"Y-yeah," He fumbled, hastily pulling keys out of his back pocket.

* * *

The soft boiling of water on a kettle interrupted the uncomfortable silence between Naruto and Sakura. She came over, asked to come in, and started boiling water for tea. The house was strangely clean, but dust was everywhere because nobody had been downstairs in weeks.

Hinata was sitting next to him, watching Sakura with those startling eyes.

"You need to get a grip, Naruto." Sakura's said. Naruto's eyes narrowed.

"You can't just come to my house and tell me to get a grip, Sakura, after I lost the love of my life." Naruto said icily, glaring at Sakura.

"It's been 3 months already, Naruto. Trapping yourself in grief isn't healthy, and you're not getting any better."

"You don't know what it feels like, Sakura, so don't even-"

"Yes I do. In case you haven't noticed, _everybody _experienced grief during the war. My father _died._" Sakura stood up angrily, knocking her chair over.

"That's different, Sakura. You know that." She stared at Naruto for what seemed like forever before finally leaving his house.

There was a long pause before Hinata quietly pointed out that the stove was still on.

* * *

_Hinata smiled at Naruto, getting into bed. They slept in the same bed, lived in the same house... heck, they might as well have been married, but the village was more concerned with rebuilding than any ceremonies._

_"Hinata, should we try again?" Naruto asked. Hinata whipped her head around. "Try? Umm...sure..." Hinata trailed off. "Are you sure?" Naruto said, sensing her discomfort._

_"Well, I have something to tell you first." Hinata said. Naruto kissed her, moving slowly to her neck. Hinata moaned. "No, I'm serious." She fidgeted. _

_"Can't it wait?" Naruto whispered into her ear. "I...I g-guess." Hinata complied._

Naruto woke up, forehead covered in sweat.

"I had another dream." Naruto sighed, turning to his late girlfriend.

"You know that other night when you said you had to tell me something?" Naruto questioned. Hinata nodded sadly. "What did you need to tell me?"

"I'm pregnant." She held her stomach.

He cried again, for the first time in weeks.

* * *

Six months. Six months was the time it took it took him to realize he was going insane. He was talking to Hinata regularly, having full-blown conversations with a dead woman.

He knew she was dead; he wasn't _that _crazy. But he couldn't stay away from her. She was everywhere. And it didn't bother him anymore.

So he talked to her while he walked to the Hokage's office, ignoring the weird looks. But Hinata sat away from him in Tsunade's office to avoid conversation.

Tsunade eyed the boy and clucked her tongue. He had let himself go, and he was slipping. He was staring at her, but he wasn't seeing her; he was muttering to himself; all this and more. She should've known. Hinata was his world. She clenched and unclenched her hands, trying to put the news as lightly as she could.

"Naruto, you're dying."

That news should've sent him staggering, but it was more of a muted thud if anything. He tried to focus on Tsunade, but instead ended up shifting his gaze on Hinata. She was looking at him sadly, but knowingly. _She knew. _Naruto felt oddly betrayed, although she was dead.

"You have a tumor in your brain. It's causing your realistic hallucinations, and ultimately it will kill you." Tsunade continued. "It's a fairly low risk procedure, but if you do it,"

The catch. There's _always _a catch.

"You'll forget everything. You'll forget all your memories with Hinata. You'll forget her entirely." Tsunade said slowly. "What is your decision?"

_Freedom, _Naruto thought. Freedom from the millions of thoughts that ran through his brain everyday, freedom from the condescending looks, the pity. He'd be like his normal-

Hinata turned to him, and his heart dropped. He knew his answer.

Her smile, her pout, _everything about her, _was now the reason he lived. She grinned at him, and he wanted to kiss her one last time. His eyes watered, and he smiled at Tsunade.

"No."

He'd rather die than forget.

* * *

_Once again, I didn't come up with this story, there's a story called Remembrance that this is based off of. I used NaruHina instead of ShikaTema, even though it's a pretty good pairing. Listen to the song 'Forget It' by Blood Orange. It's really good. I didn't write the lyrics down because I didn't want to make it a songfic, but still. :3 Rate and Review!_


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